After the tragic passing of Danielle in Goa, India recently, the place where I am now and that I love, I feel that it is important to talk about female safety for solo travel. Specifically, I want to shed light on the topic when travelling in India and in all places in the world. Danielle, just like myself and many other females in India, was just looking to travel the world, have experiences she would not have at home and to learn about new cultures.
Danielle’s attacker was someone known to her. She wasn’t doing anything wrong but celebrating a festival, Holi, known as the Festival of Love. I am far from saying that she could have prevented what happened to her by following these tips. However what happened to her is a little too close for comfort, being just 86 kms away from where I am staying in Goa.
So I wanted to put together some advice for those who venture into solo female travel. I wanted to help them stay safe whilst travelling in Goa, India and which can also be used when travelling the rest of this beautiful world we live in.
Always let someone know where you are.
Everyone knows this tip, right? But how many of you actually carry it out? I can personally say that I drop my location on Whatsapp to my parents when I go to a new place. I send over my flight details before getting on a plane and I tell them what long distance train/bus I am taking.
But what about more local plans? I always tell the accommodation when I am going in the evening. Most of the time I am with friends I have made at the accommodation and always use the buddy system. I make it clear to the person who runs the accommodation that I will be back that night. A lot of the time I stay within families and they certainly know where I am.
I have witnessed many a worried travelled buddy searching for their companion the next morning in Goa after they have pulled an all nighter in one of the many out of the way clubs which turn the music off at 6 to 10am. YES! 10am! The most recent was a brother searching for his sister after she went to an all night rave. With no way of contacting her, and being only days after the death of Danielle, he could only assume the worst. She did eventually show up, oblivious to the upset she had caused.
Clothes matter for solo female travel.
Do your research. What is expected of you in the country you are visiting? In India, I cover up. If I wear a dress which is above my knees then I wear leggings underneath. If my top is in any way revealing then I wear a scarf. My clothing is not skin tight but baggy. This is a basic tip for solo female travel in India.
That said in Goa the rules are different. You can wear shorts and you can certainly wear a bikini on the beach. But when walking around , you will get unwanted attention from Indian tourists if you wear just your bikini top and shorts. A few days ago on the beach I saw a women swimming and sunbathing topless. Nearby was a group of Indian tourists apparently taking selfies but with their cameras at the wrong angle. Please remember you are in India not a nudist beach in France.
Be aware of your surroundings.
When walking around be observant. Use your intuition. If something does not look or feel right then turn around and walk away. Being lost is not a nice feeling. You will show you vulnerability even though you do not mean to. Nip into a shop, a restaurant and order a coffee or when in India a Chai and get your bearings. Ask the shop owner or restaurant worker for directions.
Even better read my post about 8 things all travellers should know about using Google Maps offline. That way it is hard to get lost.
Speak about not your boyfriend but your husband.
When you are not married, it is a little weird making out that you are married. It is no good just talking about your boyfriend. But a husband takes it to the next level. Indians tend to marry only once therefore men will not tend to give you any hassle if they think you are married.
However this can become embarrassing if you then become friends with the guy you tell you are married. What are you meant to say. . . “oops sorry I told you I was married but I was worried you might try it on with me!!!”
Stranger Danger!
I’m not saying never meet new people. Far from that as I love meeting new people. All I am saying is be aware and be careful. I use meetup places like Couch Surfing (I know there has been the odd bit of bad press here but I have only ever had good experiences). I religiously use the references as a screen and yes you have guessed it, I tell my parents the name of the profile and a link of who I am going to stay with.
But be aware that although it seems more safe, most attacks are carried out by people you know. This was certainly the case with Danielle. All you can do is try your best to be safe.
Have a local sim card. and know who to call.
I always get a local sim when I am staying in a country for any length of time. Then if I am in any type of danger then I can call someone. But who am I going to call? Well I make sure I know who to call in an emergency. I also make sure I can contact the place I am staying in case I get completely lost.
Keep control of your senses.
Drugs and alcohol can make you that much more vulnerable. But other things can do too. Being over tired when travelling can make you take risks. If you are on a long journey, make sure you have transportation from the place you are arriving at, to your accommodation.
As for alcohol, if I am alone then I do not drink anything. I want to have all my senses alert. I also make sure that I do not take open drinks from strangers. And if I am with a group of people, that I do not leave my drink unattended.
As for drugs, Goa is a massive party place for Trance music which is a big scene for drugs. I have seen many females completely out of control of their senses. This leaves you vulnerable. To be safe as a solo female travel, always say no to drugs.
Rape Alarm or pepper spray.
I personally do not travel with either of these. My feelings are that I can scream as loud as a rape alarm and I don’t have to get anything out of my bag to do so. However I do understand that it is the shock of the sound which wards off attackers.
Photo credit: defenseexpress.com
As for pepper spray, this is illegal in some countries but I agree it can be useful. But again you have to get it out of your bag. I try not to put myself in situations where using these items would be necessary but you never know.
Do you have any advice for solo female travel enthusiasts? Any ways that you keep yourself safe? Please comment below and of course don’t forget to subscribe to my blog (It’s free) for more travel advice and stories from my travels.
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Another advice is unfortunately to avoid Holi! The festival is more and more dangerous because of bhang, alcohol and men behaviour. There were several articles these last weeks on the problems two Indian travel bloggers recently encounter there. Most of my Indian friends have always recommended me not to celebrate Holi or to celebrate only in a small village with my friends.
I also generally avoid the other foreigners where I travel. I’m often safer with the locals! Particularly true in Thailand.
I can’t agree more about the clothes. I always wear pants and shirts… opposite to this blond girl on the pic…
I heard bad things about Holi festival but I didn’t actually have a problem however even though I was celebrating it i Goa I did celebrate it in the smaller villages.
Just to clarify: I don’t think clothing is a factor in rape, but people should dress appropriately. I wear loose, lightweight clothes in India because they are practical for the climate and out of respect for the local culture, not because of fear of rape.
I really believe that your advice about alcohol is key. I think if you are a female travelling alone, then you should be very careful about drinking too much unless you really know the people around you. It sucks to think this way, but local women don’t drink much (if at all) and so Indian men view drunk foreigners as liberated, assuming that they are seeking male attention.
I love India (I lived there for two years), but rape is a massive cultural problem; although rape of local women is far more common than rape of foreign women. What a woman wears is rarely a factor. Rape is about power, not sex, so I don’t think rapists pay much attention to her clothes – more about how easy it will be to grab and hold her down. A drunk woman is an easier target and less likely to be able to identify him afterwards.
Holi is notorious for groping/sexual assault – my female friends there do not go out on the street during Holi – ever. They play with their families and friends in secure compounds only. They strongly advised me not to play with anybody I didn’t know. I took their advice for the first Holi I ever attended and it was awesome. The men were respectful, kind, and asked before putting any colour on me. They only put colour on my face. The following year I ignored all advice and took to the streets. I went back to the hotel after 15 minutes having been groped numerous times – by teenage boys, middle-aged men, and elderly ‘gentlemen’. Sadly, Holi seems to have become all about men getting high on bhang and running around the streets causing chaos. I wouldn’t attend it again.
I love India, and think that women can and should travel there – even alone. But stay in a state that allows you to keep your wits about you, and if that means taking it easy on the alcohol then so be it. I was dreadfully sorry to hear about Danielle, she was in a part of Goa that I went to often and she did nothing to bring it upon herself other than be in the wrong place at the wrong time. I hope that one day these attacks stop forever, but a cultural shift in the way Indian men think needs to happen first. I know many wonderful Indian women and a few equally Indian men who are leading the way and I pray that their generation will bring the change!
Sorry for the long comment. Danielle’s death and your post struck close to my heart.
Thank you so much for your comment.
I too absolutely love India and have not had any trouble whilst travelling. Just a lot of ‘selfie’ requests which get a bit tiresome at times. I did celebrate Holi in Goa but I stuck to small villages. I have heard bad things about the ‘normal’ Holi on the street from girls at the hostel.
I completely agree that alcohol (and drugs) in Goa has a large part to do with things however this is not an excuse for men to take advantage. What happened to Danielle also struck me close to my heart. I just hope that they have caught the person/people involved and something this tragic does not happen again.
Thanks again for your comment
Also I am sorry to hear about your experience the second time round during Holi. No one should be groped . . .ever!
I am super sorry to hear about what happened to Danielle in India. I wish nothing of that sort ever happens to anyone anywhere. I loved the tips you shared. They are practical and I too follow them as I am myself a solo traveler.
Thanks for your comment Archana. Such sad news about Danielle.
Great tips Kathy! I really want to visit India! You haven’t put me off at all! It’s just common sense and being self aware!
Thanks Wendy. Yes you just need to use common sense. Bad things happen all over the world. it is a shame that the attention is current;y on India. Such tragic news about Danielle
Some great tips for travelling abroad. In any location, even at home, I feel there are risks associated with being out alone wandering. There are of course dangers everywhere, but it is especially important to be a little more aware of your surroundings when you are less knowledgable on the are you are travelling to. Thanks for sharing. I am married myself and so referring to my husband works out well overtime.
Thanks Riely. As you said when in unfamiliar surrounding it is important to have more self awareness
Wow, I somehow hadn’t heard of this and just googled her… What a horrible, horrible tragedy. This post is great though and I love your tips. I used to always wear a ring on my ring finger (even here in America) to keep guys away and surprisingly it worked quite well! I never thought of doing it as a safety tip, though. You are smart 🙂 Thanks for sharing!
It is so sad what happened to her. I am glad you like the tips.
Hello Kathy, thanks for sharing your tips. I must say India has never been on my ‘to visit list’ and I think I will keep it that way. But your tips are good wherever you are and whichever country you visit. It is very sad that as you have mentioned most attackers are known to the victim. And that certainly is a case with many places on the planet 🙁
Thanks for your comment Grace. India is a lovely place but it is not everyone’s cup of Chai. However yes you can use the tips everywhere in the world. Happy travels